For a lack of something better to post about:
The biggest obstacle of going to the mall is dodging all of the kiosk workers once I'm inside. They remind me of the Lagoon game employees who always jump out at you, brandishing oversized pink giraffes in your face to rope you into shelling out $5 to throw a ring around a bottle.
Usually I can manage to avoid these pesky mall salesmen by speeding down the halls with both of my girls in the double stroller and avoiding eye contact. Today when we got to the mall, I groaned when I opened the trunk and saw that I only had my single stroller on hand. Meaning Katelyn would have to go on foot. Meaning we'd be moving at a snail's pace. Meaning, I would be an easy target for the kiosk pests. Like a lame tiger in the jungle; I wouldn't stand a chance. Sure enough, Katelyn's speed had us all moving as slow as cold tar, giving the impression that I was just out for a leisurely stroll. Every sales pitcher's dream. Little did they know, my only point of interest in the entire mall was a stop at the food court for hot dogs on a stick.
We moved like a herd of turtles as I shot down one amazing offer after another. Mineral face masks, nail polish that changes color in the sun, Asian art, Asian neck massage (which I'd have considered had I been alone), and bejeweled coin purses. It was clear through Emily's back arching and impatient snorting that she had had quite enough of the stroll. But could that stop the persistent kiosk nerds? NEVER!!!
Tell me, what is it about a mother with a fussy toddler that says, "Stop me and attempt to give me a 15 minute demonstration on how to attach hair extensions?" The only welcome peddler we encountered was a woman from the Nordstrom cafe, who approached us with a tray full of strawberry smoothie samples. Now that I can handle.
Another Year of Christmas Countdowns on Studio 5
9 years ago
Julie is every kiosk owner's bff. She often listens, tries out and purchases items offered (she once bought me an entire dead sea skin collection).
ReplyDeleteI was also hoping you would run into the nice Israelis selling skin care from the Dead Sea. Once they cornered me when Amelia was throwing a fit and yet they continued to push their product. The nerve of some people.
ReplyDeleteThis is my main complaint about the mall. There's nothing like pushing a screaming baby in a stroller through the mall and having one of those kiosk folk step in front of you and ask for a few minutes of your time. Yeah, right! (Also, the store aisles are never wide enough for strollers.)
ReplyDeleteIt's really the purpose of your trip to the mall that makes this story!
ReplyDeleteHey, I do not. That was just a one time mistake and I am one who tries to learn from her mistakes. That's why I'm always learning. I'd go for the smoothies too.
ReplyDeleteYou're a brave woman. I think I would have opted out of hot dog on a stick in favor of a drive-through.
ReplyDelete